Sunday, December 17, 2006

Stuffing euros down our throats

Cranmer’s sermon this morning was on the real-meaning-of-Christmas versus the orgy of Saturnalian materialism that it has become (or reverted to being). He exhorted his flock from the Prophet Jeremiah: ‘Thus saith the LORD, Learn not the way of the heathen, and be not dismayed at the signs of heaven; for the heathen are dismayed at them. For the customs of the people [are] vain: for [one] cutteth a tree out of the forest, the work of the hands of the workman, with the axe. They deck it with silver and with gold; they fasten it with nails and with hammers, that it move not.’

And as the sheep within his flock bethought themselves guiltily of their trees, lights and tinsel, Cranmer told them of his own Christmas shopping expedition yesterday, in search of stocking fillers. Not that the children hang stockings any more - indeed, a pillowcase is rarely of sufficient size these days - but Cranmer buys numerous small gifts for various miscellaneous progeny, and he found himself in Boots buying chocolates.

There was a time when the foil-wrapped golden coins were sterling – crowns, half-crowns, or sovereigns – or they resembled magnificent doubloons, and encouraged fantastical games of pirates or hours of treasure seeking. But all Cranmer could find was foil-wrapped foreign currency.

And this was not just any foreign currency. No, these were euros.

If the British people have an aversion to the euro, let us stuff them down their throats - literally. The single European currency is sneaking in through the back door - disguised as a festive stocking filler - and sweet-toothed children are being brainwashed into accepting as utterly normal these gold and silver tokens instead of the national currency.

Chocolatising the euro is evidently seen as a good way of winning over people to accept this as the future currency of the United Kingdom. Cranmer did not purchase any; indeed, he moved a few bags nearer to a heating source, in the intense hope that they would melt into an amorphous lump.

13 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Cranmer did not purchase any; indeed, he moved a few bags nearer to a heating source, in the intense hope that they would melt into an amorphous lump."

Excellent move, I would've done the same.

17 December 2006 at 12:50  
Anonymous Voyager said...

You will probably find it is cheap chocolate from Spain or elsewhere rather than being manufactured in the UK as in the past.


On your broader point I thought that motto: The Cross stands while the world revolves to be most apt

17 December 2006 at 13:15  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

But, Thos., you appear to have bought at least one coin for illustrative purposes (you would never steal it, of course).

17 December 2006 at 13:50  
Anonymous Voyager said...

http://www.heritagechocolates.com/

http://www.chocolatetradingco.com/browsecategory.asp?ID=51

17 December 2006 at 13:51  
Anonymous Voyager said...

http://just-chocolate.co.uk/Coins.htm

http://www.villagesweetshop.com/showprod_NS40.htm

http://www.sweetthoughts.co.uk/acatalog/Chocolate_Coins.html

17 December 2006 at 13:56  
Anonymous Dexey said...

Voyager said...
You will probably find it is cheap chocolate from Spain or elsewhere rather than being manufactured in the UK as in the past.

I had some from Israel once and it was awful. To be fair though German, Belgian and Swiss chocolate is much better than Cadbury's finest.

I fear Your Grace that given your somewhat distinctive looks and dress that you were probably seen moving the chocolates nearer the brazier.

17 December 2006 at 16:05  
Blogger wrinkled weasel said...

Well it wouldn't be English Chocolate would it? Not only is it not "chocolate" by EC standards, it gets mixed in with effluent during manufacture. If his Grace wishes to poison his progeny with poo, all well and good, but give me a toblerone anytime.

17 December 2006 at 21:26  
Anonymous dexey said...

Your Grace,
have you seen this?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=423111&in_page_id=1770
Sorry for putting it here but I din't know how else to show you.

17 December 2006 at 21:52  
Blogger Protestant said...

It should be needless to say that the ultimate goal here is achieving real political 'unity'--if you excuse me using a positive term to describe such a negative thing ("United States of Europe")--in economic disguise.

Now, it is a fact that the EU is majority Catholic, thus the de-facto religion of the "United States of Europe" would be Roman Catholicism, with the Vatican as the unquestioned religious spokesman, spiritual leader, and politico-religious representative of the EU.

This religious aspect of the European Union "question" goes often overlooked. But there is no clearer or more present danger to Protestants in Europe--religiously, not just politically--than this sinister Vatican-backed plan to 'unite' Europe under a single [Roman Catholic] state.

This is elaborated upon in an excellent essay here:
http://www.ianpaisley.org/article.asp?ArtKey=conspiracy

18 December 2006 at 00:22  
Blogger Newmania said...

I spotted that your Grace . Did you notice the serving of halal meat in schools to those who consider the practice cruel; without their knowledge.

Continuing the Newmania family’s Damascene conversion I today went to the very modern St. Marks where repeated references were made to Mary as a single mum awt on the street . Odd I thought . Also the Lords prayer has become so mangled I could not join in and the Music ….surely designed to make the most faithless pray for mercy. Some terrifying ”healing” went on as well and I silently decided never to return . I am looking for a church where they leave you to puzzle alone assisted by beauty and the eternal cadence of the book of Common Prayer . Not to be found in these parts I fear.


Place gaucherie insanity unctuous self satisfaction and a pinch of the infantile into a pot and leave to bore for one and a half hours . Here is a Service I made earlier in the show ……

Why does everything get worse

18 December 2006 at 00:25  
Anonymous Colin said...

Dexey,

Thank you for this excellent article about halal meat being served at school.

That's logical consistency: First, the PC crowd protests for animal rights. Now, the PC crowd favours cruel killing practices. The PC conscience appears to be somewhat arbitrary. What is next, stoning?

18 December 2006 at 00:32  
Blogger wrinkled weasel said...

Well Colin,

as I said earlier -
Relativism is heading for a collision with itself.

Already liberal humanists cannot square the circle between multiculturalism and the homophobia, misogyny and fascism of Islam. - It presents them with a dichotomous problem of correctness, one among many.

The halal issue is another one.
They are deconstructing themselves at a delightfully fast pace.

At the moment, it's prostitutes, who appear to be current candidates for beatification and two minute silences.

This week a memorial service for four fishermen who died at sea, took place with no satellite TV vans, no 24 hour coverage and no impassioned stories about the dangers our fishermen face or the unfair EC restrictions.

Sooner or later ordinary people must realise they have been conned...

"but they became futile in their thinking, and their senseless minds were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools"

18 December 2006 at 01:41  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can think of nothing more apt than a chocolate Euro.

In the beginning it seemed sweet, but the more one had, the more it made one sick. So sick in fact that the title sick man of Europe today has many candidates.

18 December 2006 at 11:42  

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