Wednesday, September 10, 2008

EU subsidises End of the World... today

At precisely 8.00am GMT leading physicists of the world begin their quest for the ‘God particle’ as they attempt to recreate the Big Bang - despite warnings it could destroy the universe.

In the depths of a 17-mile-long tunnel somewhere beneath the Swiss-French Alps, scientists at the European Centre for Nuclear Research (CERN) are intent on causing particle beams to collide close to the speed of light. It is thought that this will create a Little Bang – a microcosm of the explosion which is believed to have given birth to the cosmos ex nihilo.

Cosmologists believe that an infinitely dense object about the size of a small coin (so not quite ‘nihilo’) occurred about 13.7 billion years ago, which yielded all the matter which constitutes the universe. In searching for the Higgs boson, or ‘God particle’, they hope to establish the existence of that which gives matter its mass.

But prophets of doom have warned that this is delving into the realms where no man has gone before, and that ‘dark matter’ and ‘dark energy’ are simply meant to remain in the realm of mystery. Their concern is that the experiment will create black holes with such a colossal gravitational pull that the whole Earth could be sucked into it. And if the planet does not implode, ‘worm holes’ might be created in the space-time continuum which will permit ET to invade.

Cranmer shall watch and wait.

However, since there has been no battle of Armageddon and the Lord has not yet returned, he is rather inclined to believe that the effects of this experiment shall not be so catastrophic. But he is most intrigued to know how many of the world’s starving could have been fed, or homeless housed, or sick healed for the cost of this.

It is curious indeed that ‘Science’ can throw £5 billion at research into these speculative and theoretical unknown unknowns, subsidised by European Union through a series of ‘loans’ - while the impoverished and destitute known knowns are left to suffer and die.

Man does not deserve to discover this ‘God particle’, for it is not yet time for the final apocalypse.

20 Comments:

Blogger Botogol said...

think of it as 1/2 of the cost of the London Olympics - £9.5bn to be blown in a single, ludicrous, self-important fortnight extravaganza of minority-interest sports.

At least LCH might create a lasting scientific legacy

10 September 2008 at 10:03  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As the little man in his white coat prepares to press the button that will recreate the 'Big Bang', it occurs to me to ask just who was it that pressed the button the first time??

10 September 2008 at 10:04  
Anonymous passer by said...

Your Grace, there is no conflict between faith (Christendom at least) and science.

Science may answer the question of how, but cannot answer the question of why. I urge you to pray for its success.

10 September 2008 at 10:10  
Blogger The Secret Person said...

Yes half an Olympics, less than a tenth of a Northern Rock.

The technological spin-offs from previous experiments include the World Wide Web, given freely to the world, I think an exploitation of that technology could have earned considerably more than 5bn. And without it we would be deprived of your Grace's many worthy opinions.

10 September 2008 at 11:26  
Anonymous Yokel said...

All this creational science stuff still misses the point. Whichever way they postulate that this step or that may have occurred, it always has to suppose the conditions that existed beforehand. In this case it is beams of high energy particles. How did they get there? Who dunnit? Surely that should enable even the most obtuse atheist to understand that God exists, for who else existed before time?

10 September 2008 at 11:35  
Anonymous Nigel Sedgwick said...

Two things.

Firstly, today is not the day of colliding of near-lightspeed proton beams; that will come much later, after running up to speed and testing of the main subsystems.

Secondly, the poor will always be with us. The best known way for there to be less of them (and their state to be less dire) is greater economic activity and that, from the evidence I see, is largely driven by science and its exploitation through engineering, technology and medicine; that plus the direct benefits from scientific research of yonks ago, in ways that were never then imagined. If you want to stop reduction in poverty by scientific-based economic development, stopping funding on those aspects with less well understood benefit is certainly a good start. However, I'd suggest it might be better just to keep the total funding of 'blue-sky' research at a modest level relative to the whole economy (like it is currently) and let the scientists themselves carve up their cake (as they do currently).

Best regards

10 September 2008 at 11:42  
Blogger Tomrat said...

Your Grace,

Perhaps I should point out the following:

1. As we know how the Universe was created (Genesis 1) this research in theory should put humanist theories like the big bang to bed (we know in practice it wont, but anyway..).
2. I happen to agree with Nigel; Blue sky research is something best attained by dedicating a percentage of GDP through taxation and depending on consensus - the only difference I would state is how the findings of such research is disseminated (i.e. to those who have not contributed).
3. You need only look at such technologies as NMR, lasers and atomic energy to realise that these have been of immense benefit and were discovered as a result of less noble pursuits.

10 September 2008 at 12:27  
Blogger Dissenter said...

The cost of the CERN project is minimal considering it is spread over 17 countries and a number of years. Even if Britain had paid the whole bill in one year it would only be 5% of the anual cost of the NHS, more than that goes on unhelpful layers of management and other waste.

Creationists like myself are unafraid of the results of honest experimental science. It may turn out to produce something practical, but even if it only gives us a little more of a sense of wonder at the underlying mathematical perfection of the created order it will be worth it. We spend far more on gambling and pornography.

However, Cranmer is right to suggest that if we do not ALSO care for the dispossed, weak, poor and sick then we are not worthy.

10 September 2008 at 14:47  
Blogger Homophobic Horse said...

Scientists are the craziest people I have ever met. They point radio telescopes at distant star clusters and try to transmit messages to "alien beings". ET's are best understood as demons, and scientists as warlocks. Ergo, (some) scientists are devil worshippers.

10 September 2008 at 15:33  
Anonymous Brian514 said...

I agree that no Creationist has ever had anything to fear from real empirical science, for God alone is the Author of Truth, and since science itself is truth that can be proven, ALL observeable, testable science ever done will confirm His Truth.
An evolutionary worldview, accepted purely on faith in a wholly unproveable theory, is the leading hinderance to actual scientific process. The irrefuteable evidence screams intelligent design, a young earth and God's judgement of sin in the evidence of a world-wide flood.
However,
Humanist/Atheist/Naturalist Evolutionists will never accept any amount of evidence that disproves the theory they think/hope/pray liberates them from God. There are very many examples of things in nature that cannot be explained by evolution, and that fly in the face of the theory, showing the theory to be impossible.
When the theory dictates how you observe the evidence, and when evidence is overwhelmingly contrary to the theory, yet the evidence is thrown out in favor of a theory which has no evidence, one is no longer doing science.
All the observeable evidence -sans the evolutionary theory taint- fits seamlessly with the Biblical account.

The more we have learned about real science, the more convincing evidence there is for special creation and a flood.
The Large Hadron Collider experiement, like the telescope and the microscope, will shed light on the design on this created world.
The real question is how much evidence does an evolutionist need to realize the theory is wrong and the only alternative is correct? Or rather, how much evidence will one have to turn a blind eye to in order to keep God out of their hearts?


As for the expense of the LHC vs. poverty, its not the spending of money on such projects keeping nations poor, its the willful economical engineering of the EU and UN that is keeping nations poor. The collective riches of the world are not only beeing stockpiled by the greedy, but denied to the needy.

btw: the term "His Grace" is an usurpation of a Godly title. Call him graceful if you will, but making an adjective into a noun and capitalising it indicates perfection, which I'm sure, as another Adamite, Cranmer is not.
Glory to God alone, Amen.

10 September 2008 at 15:52  
Anonymous Mr Darwin said...

Anonymous 10.14. The truth was rather different to your imaginings. The button was pressed by a strapping Welsh gentlemen whose white coat was conspicuous only by its absence.

The ludicrous speculation that this rather modestly-powered machine might cause a black hole and bring about the end of the world before rapture or the apocalypse is merely proof that much of the mainstream media and general public are poorly educated and informaed about science.

His Grace we can excuse: he lived at a time when science was in its infancy. Other hysteical commentators may need their humours rectifying.

10 September 2008 at 18:52  
Anonymous tomorrow belongs to mo said...

Mad social scientist Gordon McBroon, who gained fame by transmuting Britain's gold reserves into base metal, and creating a debt black-hole massive enough to swallow up a year's GDP, has announced his latest project.

The Large Multi-Culti Collider will send millions of Muslims and kuffars whirling in opposite directions on a collision course. McBroon's robotic technician, Harriet the Harmoid said "We expect to see lots of big bangs when this becomes fully operational."

10 September 2008 at 19:11  
Blogger mckenzie said...

We have traveled to the moon and back, but when we launch ourselves into outer space, we send forth a severely retarded species. In essence we remain the brute, for when confronted the brute attacks, and when faced with need or desire it takes by force from the weaker members of the hierarchy. It is an anomaly that we can split the atom, but we are nearly powerless to persuade each other to embrace justice. We can recombine our genes, but we cannot, in simple ways, ask each other for love.

10 September 2008 at 19:15  
Blogger Swanky K said...

I had to check this out to see if this was real. My daughter said that her Science teacher was not at school because she said that it could possibly be the end of the world today.
I thought it was a ploy to not do her homework, but after checking it out she did indeed get a sub for herself today. I guess she wsn't worried about her students being sucked into the black hole. Anyway I did catch a report on our NPR and found that the US had also wanted to do something similar, but our congress killed it about 10 years ago. I guess they are a little jealous that it wasn't them trying this stunt.
Well we're all hear for now anyway. I'm not going to loose sleep either that some ET will find us too quickly either. They're already here remember? Two episodes of Men in Black proved that! No, seriously. This is very interesting stuff, and I am curious as to what will happen next.

11 September 2008 at 04:22  
Blogger Swanky K said...

Homophobic Horse:
You're one scary dude. Scientist are devil worshipers? Perhaps it's best that you stay under that rock you must live under b/c you seem to be stuck in your own little time warp from the Salem Witch trials. Yikes.

11 September 2008 at 04:47  
Anonymous len said...

Can only hope that these scientists are the first to dissapear into the black hole ( the 5 billion seems to have entered first!)

11 September 2008 at 07:30  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mr Darwin,

I am fully aware of the 'Welshman' connection. I believe he is from Aberdare. People from Aberdare are known in the valleys as 'snakes' (soemthing to do with a miner's strike I believe). I wonder if he is related to the original snake ...

As for you sir, if you really truly wish to concur with the bonkers theory that your great great great great great great grandad was an ape then please don't lecture other on 'hysteria' and the requirement to have their 'humour rectified'.

Brian 514: perhaps the only way that these rogues will ever have enough evidence is if God himself came and lived among us and declared truth to the human race........ oh dear he has already tried that and they still don't get it. Perhaps next time they will

Come Lord Jesus

11 September 2008 at 09:39  
Blogger Joshua said...

Ex Nihilo, Nihilo Fit!

13 September 2008 at 18:42  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You primitive savage

13 September 2008 at 23:01  
Anonymous Adrian P said...

Gordon McBroon Didn't Turn Gold into Base Metal, what happened was, after seperating our Money ( IE the Receipt for the Gold held in storage by the Banks )from the Gold, he quietly sold of the Gold to his Bilderberger Buddies at a rock bottom Price. leaving us with just a Pile of now worthless Paper Receipts.
IE he swapped a Pile of Gold, for a Pile of Worthless Paper.

That's the reality of the situation.
It costs less than a penny to print a £50 Note, and credit is thin air.
This was not a Transmutation, it was a Heist, Carried out by the British Government against Britain and Her People.

Where is our Gold Mr Brown ?

17 September 2008 at 11:45  

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