Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Cranmer’s 10 predictions for 2010

His Grace is not a prophet new inspired; he has no time for crystal balls and horoscopes. But he would like to contribute his thoughts on events and occurrences for the coming year, which will be as defining and pivotal for him as for the nation.

1. The General Election will be held in May, after one of the most personal, negative and vitriolic campaigns in history. It will result in a Conservative victory, and David Cameron will have a majority of 23.

2. The Green Party will win Brighton Pavilion, and UKIP will win Buckingham. Caroline Lucas will work closely with environment minister Zach Goldsmith: Nigel Farage will resume the mantle of party leader from Lord Pearson.

3. Gordon Brown will resign and Alan Johnson will become leader of the Labour Party. He will see it as a ‘caretaker’ role, but will in fact lead the party into the 2014 general election.

4. Government will be difficult as David Cameron has alienated so many backbenchers that they feel no obligation to be loyal. In a context of high unemployment, rising interest rates and falling house prices, the administration will be dogged by internal debates on spending cuts versus tax increases and mired in debates about the European Union. When the time comes to fulfil the manifesto pledge to cut the number of MPs at Westminster by 10 per cent, it will be ‘kicked into the long grass’ as Conservative backbenchers refuse to countenance a policy which will see the merging of some of their constituencies and an end to the tradition of parliamentary boundaries not crossing county borders.

5. Israel will attack Iran in order to halt its development of a nuclear bomb. Barack Obama will do nothing to dissuade Israel, but he will publicly condemn the action.

6. The world will be rocked by a high-profile political assassination. It will be linked to al-Qa’eda.

7. In the media and in Parliament, the Church of England will be perceived to have been surpassed by the Roman Catholic Church as the voice of orthodox Christianity in England.

8. There will be a new technological development and the fusion of multiple platforms which will lead inexorably to people living more hypnotic and addictive virtual lives in order to escape the spiritual emptiness, cynicism, tedium and depression that they associate with reality.

9. His Grace will be offered a peerage and will enter the House of Lords flanked by Baroness Thatcher and Lord Ahmed.

10. Jesus will not return. The world will not end.


Blogger DDIM 'n HOFFI said...

8. There will be a new technological development and the fusion of multiple platforms which will lead inexorably to people living more hypnotic and addictive virtual lives in order to escape the spiritual emptiness, cynicism, tedium and depression that they associate with reality.

His Grace seems to be hooked into one of these such platforms toady! A virtual reality so to speak.

I can concur though with a few of His predictions, which I thought sounded more like wishful thinking, but the mind and matter are inexorably connected so who is to say. As for the peerage, His Grace has my extended best wishes, for He often speaks my own mind on a very high percentage of occasions.

30 December 2009 at 15:03  
Blogger OldSouth said...

1. It will be a rout, but more of an anti-Gordon Brown vote than pro-Cameron; and Mr. Cameron, if he is wise, will remember that. Sadly, we will see BNP members in Parliament for the first time, and see their candidates place high in other races.

2. No comment.

3. Brown will have to go into exile somewhere. Good luck to his successor, the UK's equivalent of Gerald Ford.

4. Yep!

5. Sad, but true, because the US and the rest of the West lack the courage to act.

6. Let us pray this is not accurate. The first victim that comes to mind would be a high-profile minister in India, which would be utterly tragic.

7. Already happened. Check out the Pope's Christmas homily for this year--straight, no-chaser Christian doctrine that could be read in most Presbyterian churches.

8. I-phones and their ilk, and Wii, will become cheap and ubiquitous. Such devices have always been banned from or house, which is one reason our children succeed.

9. LOL

10. But, we can hope for that blessed event, can we not?

God bless, your Grace, and many thanks for your wisdom in 2009.


30 December 2009 at 16:18  
Blogger Robert said...

Wonderfully perceptive. As an American, I can't speak much to the first four predictions, but the rest of them are directly on point.

Except the last one. I would never wave at the coming of Christ. You are correct that the world will not end (the idea of the "end of the world" is an incorrect one, though popular in today's culture), but you are rather presumptive in affirming that he will not come. When Christ does return, he will establish a kingdom here on earth that will last a thousand years.

Sound far-fetched? Be patient, your grace.

30 December 2009 at 16:25  
Blogger Frugal Dougal said...

i agree broadly, Your Grace, but still think that Tory backbenchers will pull together and be more loyal than is generally predicted, for the sake of the party and of their place in British political history.

30 December 2009 at 16:51  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good predictions but hope your right about a Tory win

I think the future of Christianity on this island lies in the main not with the established church nor with RC church but with independent new churches and revived older churches (baptists ,pentecostals etc )though the media wont catch up for a number of years yet with what is happening in local communities

30 December 2009 at 16:57  
Blogger John R said...

A fine list Your Grace. However I think Number 4 underestimates the rebellious feelings that wil be expressed by a majority of the newly elected backbenchers. Tory High Command is consistently very much less Eurosceptic than many of the candidates that are going to be standing in the election. I think Cameron will be forced (gracefully or otherwise) into finally resolving the Lisbon/Rome referendum question very early in the new session. If he's sensible he'll ride the wave, if not he'll be swamped.

30 December 2009 at 17:06  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Lords return will be closer, the established church will continue on its journey back to rome whom burned her fathers who refused to accept transubstiation and other popish doctrine, cameron will win but with a much reduced majority due to him alienating the so called by him 'sour faced little englanders' namely th eones whom call for england to have the same rights as his beloved scotland of whom he says he has blood running through his veins, the bnp, ukip and eng dems will grow in number, islam will grow in influence as the establishment will not tackle it due to fear with the nation drifting towards dhimification, the true church which honours Christ and his word not the traditions of men goes further underground, prices rocket due to browns deficit, england dont win the world cup, scotland continue to dominate as heart disease capital of europe, sea levels do not rise and the world does not end due to global warming or natural climate change to be more precise, british soldiers continue to die in afghanistan for no reason whatsoever.

30 December 2009 at 17:08  
Anonymous Ginro said...

Additionally, there will be lots of weather, lots of terrorist atrocities, lots of angry letters sent to newspapers at which point the senders will sit back rejoicing in their self-righteous belief that they have done their bit to save the country and other people can get their hands dirty instead.

I made a number of predictions at the beginning of 2008. It's interesting to see how many of them actually came true, lol:

Prediction One:
A lot of people of a certain religious persuasion will get offended about something completely innocuous and go on the rampage in a blind desire to demonstrate a greater religious anger within themselves than their religious neighbours. This self-induced myopic disorder will be so incapacitating that they'll be completely unaware of the dozens of other protestors being trampled to death by one another. This could quite possibly happen several times this year. A long shot I know but it's still possible.

Prediction Two:
Gordon *Mr Bean* Brown will break his word on something again. Hey, yes I know that's a safe bet but hasn't forecasting always had a long history of going for the safe bets?

Prediction Three:
A Westerner will make a programme about Islam, warts and all, and be threatened with death.

Prediction Four:
Turkey and/or it's supporters will try to shut up anyone who investigates the Assyrian Genocide.

Prediction Five:
In January it might snow. This will be cited by global warming enthusiasts as proof that global warming is happening.

Predicition Six:
In the summertime it will be quite hot occasionally, and possibly sunny too. This will also be cited by global warming enthusiasts as proof of global warming.

Prediction Seven:
It might rain quite a bit and cause flooding. This will be cited by global warming enthusiasts as further evidence of global warming.

Prediction Eight:
It will be carefully pointed out to all the global warming enthusiasts that the reason we have so much flooding today is because all of natures floodplains are being built over which is preventing the water from getting back into the system safely the way it used to do!!!

Prediction Nine:
The global warming enthusiasts will listen and try to give the impression that they can use reason and logic and then run off skipping and crying 'Oooh look at the pretty colours'.

Prediction Ten:
If that bozo in the house behind mine doesn't stop setting off those damned bloody fireworks he might not get to see in the year 2009!

Prediction Eleven:
My daughter will tell me off for shouting at people again.

Prediction Twelve:
We in the UK will get more and more naffed off with the politicians in Parliament, and even more p****d off with the E.U.S.S.R.

Prediction Thirteen:
People will still keep blogging under the misapprehension that they are actually achieving something.

Spooky, lol.

30 December 2009 at 17:39  
Blogger The Lakelander said...

If number 6 has to be anyone, could it be Tony Blair....please?

30 December 2009 at 18:33  
Blogger Archdruid Eileen said...

Your Grace

Re number 10(A) - We could at least pray? Number 10(B) I am sure you are correct.

Happy new Year

30 December 2009 at 18:45  
Blogger angelneptunestar said...

The Book of Revelation foretells the end of the world and we are experiencing many of the events described. So please do tell us, is Armageddon at hand?

30 December 2009 at 19:45  
Blogger angelneptunestar said...

Oh and also, very important question here, how do you foresee the future of the famous Johnson dynasty working out? Good is it?

30 December 2009 at 19:49  
Blogger angelneptunestar said...

Finally, do your predictions for the Prime Minister coincide with my own? I have psychic powers and have heard the drumming very faintly already!

30 December 2009 at 19:52  
Blogger English Pensioner said...

I would comment on just a few of your predictions
No 2. As a UKIP supporter, I hope you are right, but fear it will not be so.
No 5. I feel it is more likely that Mossad will try their hand first. The odd non-attributable assassination or two, for example.
No 7. Very true. The C of E just seems to be fading away. I still attend my Parish Church, but on moral issues I would now look to Rome rather than Canterbury.

30 December 2009 at 20:13  
Anonymous oiznop said...

Can you explain No9?

Wouldn't you rather be in the House of Commons?

Is Lord Ahmed your choice???

30 December 2009 at 20:20  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

English Pensioner

Being attracted to the morality of Rome is a strange public confession? I am attracted to the morality of neither. Stick to your parish church and speak your mind and follow your heart until your church either finds a day of Pentecost or burns to the ground, or both. Sod any attempt to corrupt your own understanding by men wearing unusual clothing. Foxes have holes and birds have nests......special clothing is all very nice but do not attribute things to it that do not exist in your heart.

Rome may attract you because of it's strict rules, but God is in the same place each day. Concentrate upon this notion alone.

That is my advice. I only wish I could do it myself but I am an asshole. Good luck should you wish to accept your mission.

30 December 2009 at 20:29  
Blogger Joshua said...

11. We'll hear less talk on climate change and more about "energy security" and continue down the same line of making it even harder for the poor to both eat and heat their homes.

30 December 2009 at 20:50  
Anonymous Zach Johnstone said...

Your Grace,

I like how number three implicitly relays a further prediction, namely that 2014 will be the next general election year. Can I presume that this means no hung parliament or, indeed, in the event of a hung parliament, no immediate return to the ballot box?

30 December 2009 at 21:14  
Anonymous no nonny said...

Mostly depressing, Your Grace, but undoubtedly spot on!!

As to #9 -- I'm fascinated!! Hope it's more than a vision for you ... providing that it wouldn't prove to be a nightmare!!

30 December 2009 at 22:28  
Blogger Christian Carving said...

maybe 4 of these predictions correct..the rest ..!

30 December 2009 at 22:49  
Anonymous Greg said...

One would think you would get your spelling right in your predictions. Zach is Zac. If one cannot spell right why should one believe your predictions?

31 December 2009 at 01:45  
Anonymous sydneysider said...

Accept the peerage by all means but find somewhere else to sit.
I don't like either of your flankers. Happy New Year!

31 December 2009 at 06:29  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The great ground for hope is that the event you mention in prediction 10 is coming soon, whether or not He returns in 2010. We sinners have made such a very great mess of things that only the Lord of Glory himself will be able to sort it out.

Keep up the good work and best wishes for 2010!

31 December 2009 at 08:26  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

English pensioner , don't look to rome whom burned your fathers and preaches false doctrine, dont look to canterbury and the welsh druid who sist there overseeing the c of e's downfall, look only to Christ and His word, you dont need a man made club like rome or canterbury, JESUS is all you need.

31 December 2009 at 10:30  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why is it that so many people see the CofE dieing, My own Church in Lancashire is growing fast and when I am working in Cambridge I attend another growing CofE church, a friend pasters a third. The is life in the ashes and in alot of ways the longer it remains hidden the better, The ruling class in the country has it in for the CofE.

31 December 2009 at 15:56  
Anonymous פסיכיאטר said...

depression is a bitch!. I treat people who suffer from depression and i must say that it's not a picnic neither for them or for their families. depression is not merely a state of mind it can prove to be a state of state causing a state of mind for the induvidual. nobody wants to be lkeft alobe or outside the game field

31 December 2009 at 16:55  
Anonymous len said...

English Pensioner,
Anon 10:30 has got it spot on!.

Jesus said of His promise of the Holy Spirit,
"But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come". ( John 16:13)

We live in an era of almost total and universal deception and the only way to know the truth is to listen to the Spirit of Truth, the Spirit of Jesus Christ.

31 December 2009 at 19:06  
Anonymous Fredericks said...

It's gonna be Al-Qaeda's year:D

31 December 2009 at 19:22  
Blogger North Northwester said...

Yeah. Natch. And so what?

Happy New Year, peeps.


31 December 2009 at 20:29  
Blogger Preacher said...

Without me, God can do anything.
Without God, I can do nothing.
God bless you all. Happy 2010.


1 January 2010 at 12:23  
Anonymous jeremy hyatt said...

My comments...

1 As good a guess as any

2 Maybe one or the other but not both

3/4 Nah - Better bet Miliband (Ed I mean, not David). Don't assume Lord Snooty and his Pals will last to 2014. By the way, can one of his policy wonks tell Lord Snooty that rudeness to people of no importance creates a very bad impression?

5 You wish

6 Who knows?

7 This one has been peddled for decades. That's a no

8 An overstatement of a serious issue

9 Erm

10 well, you never know

1 January 2010 at 15:19  

Post a Comment

<< Home

Newer›  ‹Older