Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Prime Minister Boris?

There is much talk at the moment of Boris Johnson succeeding David Cameron as leader of the Conservative Party and becoming the next Prime Minister. Certainly, with the demise of the proposed boundary changes, David Cameron will not win a majority at the next general election on the present trajectory. Tim Montgomerie has already plotted the path Boris needs to take; Pete Hoskin points out that the Mayor's appeal reaches beyond London and the traditional Conservative vote; but Iain Dale has published a book repudiating the possibility (or at least employing the wrong tense). One senior Conservative source was reported last week as saying: "If the answer is Boris, it's some question."

His Grace would like to offer some profound political insight and intelligent comment on the 'Boris for PM' phenomenon:


Blogger Sam Vega said...

Thank you for sparing us the thinly-veiled homoeroticism to which we were treated before the general election. The pictures say it better.

14 August 2012 at 10:40  
Blogger Youthpasta said...

The brilliance of Boris is that he fits the mould of the performer who can believe absolutely anything he thinks will win him votes and still be a likeable guy. Ken Livingstone trapped on a zip wire would have been a damp squib, Boris made it an event with typical humour.
The sad thing is that this is perpetuating the lack of conviction politics at the top of government and leaving it to the SpAds and number crunchers to make policy.
I think that, as a figurehead, Boris is amazing. As a true leader he is still to show he can do something because he truly believes in it. If we want a showman as our PM then look no further. If we want someone who acts on their beliefs then look to David Davies or Duncan Carswell, or hope and pray that Boris is up to the task. For me, I'd much rather go for the proven and leave Boris as Mayor of London.

14 August 2012 at 10:43  
Blogger Youthpasta said...

Sorry, I meant Douglas Carswell. Brain failure on my part there!

14 August 2012 at 10:44  
Blogger IanCad said...


I often mix up Davies and Davis.
Did you mean the latter?

14 August 2012 at 11:10  
Blogger thumrat said...

It's the stature that compels.

14 August 2012 at 11:30  
Blogger The Gray Monk said...

Frankly he'd be a breath of fresh air - and he couldn't possibly be any worse than all of the alternatives!

14 August 2012 at 11:39  
Blogger Damian said...

Was'nt he being accused of being anti-semetic on this blog not long ago?

14 August 2012 at 11:47  
Blogger Corrigan1 said...

a self-regarding clown, a joke and an embarrassment to any serious political party - oh, wait, political parties nowadays are only masonic lodges for the career advancement of their members. Carry on, Boris.

14 August 2012 at 11:58  
Blogger tory boys never grow up said...

Quite - I was rather hoping that the LibDems would put up Lembit Opik as their candidate for Mayor of London - then all 3 parties would have had comedians as their candidates.

The country is full of entertaining and amusing individuals and eccentrics but that doesn't mean that they would make a good Prime Minister. Boris always strikes me as a latter day toff version of Norman Wisdom - perhaps we could offer him to Albania as a new Head of State?

14 August 2012 at 12:09  
Blogger Rebel Saint said...

I took the decision not to bother voting (except with my feet) in our faux democracy a while back. However, I'd make an exception if Boris were standing in my constituency. But he isn't, so I won't.

14 August 2012 at 12:29  
Blogger Youthpasta said...

IanCad - Yes, I did. Thanks for the correction.

14 August 2012 at 13:03  
Blogger John Magee said...

I am aged 64. I envy his thick head of hair.

14 August 2012 at 13:34  
Blogger William said...

There's no doubting Bojo's mojo.

Assuming that there are not too many closeted skeletons, I am sure that Boris would be a more popular proposition than Dave come the next election.

14 August 2012 at 13:35  
Blogger parepidemos said...

Having Rupert Murdochas his guest during the Olympics was rather "in your face", so I wouldn't consider him as being likely to succeed Cameron. Still, he wouldn't be boring.

14 August 2012 at 13:46  
Blogger non mouse said...

Well, we obviously don't need Statesmen.

So what are Prime Ministers for?

14 August 2012 at 14:28  
Blogger David B said...

He does play on his reputation as a buffoon rather, and somehow I'm always a little bit wary of politicians who break marriage vows - did do that didn't he?

If someone breaks a promise to spouse, it hardly inspires confidence that they will be more assiduous about breaking promises to people they don't know.

On the other hand he is a rather likeable character, appears to speak his mind, and doesn't fit the usual grey politician stereotype.

He's a more interesting character than Milliband or Cameron, by a street.

David B

14 August 2012 at 15:23  
Blogger Charles Dawne said...

Unless Boris joins Labour or the Lib Dems there will never be another Conservative Party majority again.

14 August 2012 at 16:07  
Blogger IanCad said...

Youthpasta @ 13:03:

That being the case then, I agree with your first post on this thread.

What we need is a Conservative Party leader who is unswerving in his commitment to civil liberties and able to articulate those principles to the nation as a whole. David Davis could well be that man.

For sure, Boris is preferable to Cameron, but, let's face it, that's a pretty low threshold.
I wish though, that he (Boris) would not pander to the politically correct lobby by wearing those daft hard hats.
He should show some spine and always go bare-headed.

14 August 2012 at 16:45  
Blogger Office of Inspector General said...

Your Grace, there is much madness around these days in politics, so one more example would hardly be noticed. Of course he would make a better PM than Cameron but so would half the Conservative MPs. Boris is a specialist rather than a general officer. His ideal calling would be Secretary of State for Trade and Industry. Can you imagine our world standing in that area with him out there fighting our corner !

14 August 2012 at 18:01  
Blogger carl jacobs said...

Why is he looking at a blue chicken? Is the blue chicken supposed to be some piece of profound artwork?


14 August 2012 at 19:16  
Blogger Office of Inspector General said...

Carl, ‘blue chicken’ sounds like a rude film made in a hen house...

14 August 2012 at 19:22  
Blogger E.xtra S.ensory Blofeld + Tiddles said...

Loved the montage..all that's missing is the Benny Hill theme tune.

E S Blofeld

14 August 2012 at 19:43  
Blogger Office of Inspector General said...

The Inspector wishes to announce that his steam driven lap top contraption is working at usual boiler pressure, and he cannot understand why his posts are appearing with large gaps, top and tail...

14 August 2012 at 21:01  
Blogger Office of Inspector General said...

Stone me ! Apart from the last....

14 August 2012 at 21:03  
Blogger Office of Inspector General said...


14 August 2012 at 21:03  
Blogger William said...


You may have a bit of coal dust stuck in the carriage return key. Bring up the pressure a bit more and press Crt-Alt-Del. The extra steam should clear out the sticky particles.

14 August 2012 at 21:29  
Blogger Office of Inspector General said...

Thank you William. The Inspector believes it to be a fault at the Archbishops software end, if that phrase is permitted under the decency laws. My Lord, your f{n]TRIM needs looking at, so to speak {...AHEM...}

14 August 2012 at 21:53  
Blogger Jessica Hoff said...

Boris is the only Tory most non-Tory voters like. Since non-Tory voters are in quite a large majority, it might make electoral sense to have him as leader.

At least he contributes to the great cause of cheering us all up - no other politician does that (the laughter directed at Mr. Clegg is of the hollow, mocking sort).

14 August 2012 at 22:25  
Blogger Gnostic said...

Countless photo ops. What other qualifications would a potential leader possibly need to save the UK? Having the fastest zip in Westminster?

How about another vapid camera whore for the next Chancellor of the Exchequer? I nominate Posh Spice. She couldn't be any worse than the idiots we've suffered over the last fifteen or so years.

Prime Minister Boris? You're 'aving a larf, surely. If the bloke was ever re-incarnated as an item of clothing he would come back as a flip-flop.

14 August 2012 at 22:42  
Blogger The Way of Dodo the Dude said...

I am suspicious about his attention to the rear end of a blue chicken. Has the man no self control?

15 August 2012 at 00:14  
Blogger carl jacobs said...

One other thing.

If you would all be patient with an ignorant American, perhaps I could ask what might be an obvious question. Are combs and/or brushes illegal in London?


15 August 2012 at 02:33  
Blogger Rambling Steve Appleseed said...

Since most of our laws are made in Brussels, our daily lives are administered by the quangocracy, our economic affairs are predicated by the unrepayable debt accumulated by the dead and growing weight of entitlement spending, and there is almost no difference betweenb the three socially liberal parties, yeah!

Why not have a jester as token premier?

15 August 2012 at 07:31  
Blogger Roy said...

Before the last general election David Cameroon thought that posing with a husky would show he was worried about global warming and boost his chances of being elected.

There may be a shortage of huskies in London but surely Boris could do more to impress dog lovers?

15 August 2012 at 10:05  
Blogger Roy said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

15 August 2012 at 10:05  
Blogger John Chater said...

He is an idiot in public because he knows the general public loves an idiot – if the general public loved an alien he would dress up as Mr Spock. He is an exquisite popularist, saved by a wry smile and a witty riposte. So when, for example, he speaks out in support of gay marriage or immigration it is his sense of humour that saves him from the opprobrium of the party and the silent majority (which guffaws heartily and thinks he didn't really mean it). Cameron has no such defence because he has no sense of humour – he has demonstrated again and again (and often in the company of Johnson) that he is better at laughing at jokes than making them.

The other point which differentiates Johnson from the present useless incumbent is that he is bright, not just well educated. Cameron, on the other hand, is a well-educated dullard, which is why he has, in a short space of time as PM, made so many inexplicably foolish mistakes.

In debate and in meetings Johnson demonstrates a very impressive command of any issue and is rarely (despite appearances) genuinely flustered. Even when he is gesticulating and gurning there is a strong sense that he knows exactly what he is doing. He is also an intellectual match for any interviewer.

He is also unrepentantly fat, a drinker and a stuffer, for which he is loved (and never more so than in an age obsessed with obesity and diet and appearance). The sight of a chubby fellow doing well and also feted as a Bunteresque lothario is a counter-intuitive tonic. Contrast the jolly Johnson with the skinny, swivel-eyed peacock Jeremy Hunt, a charmless man who seems to exude vanity.

Johnson's appalling treatment of his wife – if the numerous affairs are indeed truly reported, laziness and unreliability as a journalist – if indeed he was lazy and unreliable, and questionable support of Turkey's membership of the EU – if indeed, etc, etc, may say something about his standing as a man, but will do nothing to detract from his electability as leader of the Conservative Party and PM.

If he wants Cameron's job he will get it, in no small part because the party, at the all-important grass-roots level, has learnt to dislike intensely Cameron (and all of those who are seen to be his protégés – Mensch, Warsi, Hunt, etc) and cannot wait to get shot of him. After years of unremarkable suits as leader, the party wants a character in the job, someone with personality and noise who at least looks and sounds like an old school Tory. Step forward blond-boy.

15 August 2012 at 10:21  
Blogger Roy said...

tory boys never grow up said...

Quite - I was rather hoping that the LibDems would put up Lembit Opik as their candidate for Mayor of London - then all 3 parties would have had comedians as their candidates.

What if all three had decided to form a coalition afterwards? Can you imagine Boris, Ken and Lembit Opik jointly representing London?

15 August 2012 at 10:22  
Blogger bluedog said...

Quite right, John Chater @ 10.21.

Boris is the perfect foil for Dave.

Boris can play the fool or play it straight, and it takes a very clever man to do both. Dave can only play it straight. This gives Boris a significant advantage if he genuinely has leadership ambitions. Boris can throw the occasional hand-grenade at Dave, but Dave lacks the capacity to reciprocate. Boris can therefore chose the time and place of his challenges, while Dave can only react, not knowing what comes next.

Dave's other weakness is that he has built no rapport with electorate and never will, totally lacking the common touch. On the other hand Boris merely has to appear and he is immediately the centre of attention.

Dave's grip on the leadership is therefore threatened by every word that Boris utters, and Dave can do nothing.

Dave must truly regret that Boris is not bound by the rules of the Cabinet.

15 August 2012 at 10:30  
Blogger E.xtra S.ensory Blofeld + Tiddles said...

"Boris can play the fool or play it straight, and it takes a very clever man to do both."

I can honestly say I have never seen or heard him play aything straight...He uses the methods of Groucho but without his gravitas or cutting wit to make a point....is this really what we are left with for choice. God forsaken indeed!

The only candidate worth anything regarding being trustworthy and having consistency in message is john redwood but he is hampered by a nasty press and media history and his appearance or demure is not, how shall we say, 'charismatic/blairish' for the modern person brought up on cosmopolitan and fake values.

E S Blofeld

15 August 2012 at 11:03  
Blogger Rambling Steve Appleseed said...

'.....is this really what we are left with for choice. God forsaken indeed!...'


15 August 2012 at 11:45  
Blogger bluedog said...

Ernst, you have identified the dream team, Boris as PM, Redwood as Chancellor.

It is interesting to speculate on how Boris will manage his trade-mark coiffure as the years progress; baldness has the potential to ruin his dishevelled look. In the transition phase, does Boris go for a comb-over or a toupee? Indeed, it may transpire that the state of Boris' thatch is a critical determinant in the timing of any leadership challenge.

15 August 2012 at 12:02  
Blogger Berserker said...

Do Barbara and Boris use the same wig maker?

Up end them both and you would have a pair of nice kitchen mops! Up end old Dave and you would have a very slippery greasy floor but of course the remedy is to hand - get Boris out of the cupboard and a nice bowl of soft soapy water...

15 August 2012 at 12:26  
Blogger Youthpasta said...

Bluedog, you make an interesting point. We have not had a bald PM since Atlee. Kinnock was the last to try it, failed at both attempts.

15 August 2012 at 16:17  
Blogger The Ancient said...

No, no, no.

Let Helen Mirren play PM.

Boris would be much better as monarch -- a King Ralph for the 21st century, with a soupçon of William IV.

15 August 2012 at 18:05  
Blogger The Way of Dodo the Dude said...

Let's be honest, the guy's a dick-head.

17 August 2012 at 02:18  
Blogger Mme Scherzo said...

Being an American, I don't really know who or why this Boris person is. But I do notice that he looks and acts mightily like a movie character named Tom Cullen....who incidentally is also the same Patrick Starfish in Spongebob Squarepants.


Em Oh Oh En...that spells Boris.

21 August 2012 at 06:52  
Blogger Richard Jones said...

Boris is playing the game very well; never admitting he wants to be PM (in fact saying the opposite) but everyone knows he really really wants the job. Everyone has been expecting Boris to mess up his job somehow and lose any chance of making it big but he has done so well for so long that he now seems unstoppable. Now with more government experience than David Cameron Boris is looking a likely Tory leader and possible PM. I would bet on Boris to be PM before 2020

9 December 2012 at 20:59  

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