If Richard III were to stand in the Eastleigh by-election...
It is axiomatic in British politics that a donkey wearing a blue rosette would win in Kensington & Chelsea; or anything wearing a red rosette would win in Livingston, Scotland. His Grace isn't sure whether non-human candidates have ever secured such victories in the UK (unless the monkey counts?) - and Eastleigh is not a constituency known for its blind tribal loyalty - but the by-election due to take place in a fortnight following the demise of Chris Huhne really is an opportunity to move beyond the myopic prism of the interminable social-democratic consensus that afflicts Parliament and the nation's politics.
Now we know that Nigel Farage is not standing ( - once again, no groundwork, no local commitment, no strategic thought - ), there is no-one else who could win this seat for UKIP. Sir Patrick Moore might have been in with a chance, but, alas, he is no longer with us. Labour are unable to find a candidate to fight this 'hopeless' seat; the Liberal Democrats are still pondering - with rumours of arch-secularist Dr Evan Harris about to throw his stethoscope into the ring (not likely: he's waiting for a safe seat). And the Conservatives have reverted to their A-lister Maria Hutchings, who failed to win the seat in 2010 (Chris Huhne actually increased his majority against her).
Since Eastleigh has been represented by the political corpse of Chris Huhne for more than a year, its voters really ought to consider Richard III as their parliamentary candidate. He's vogue, popular, attracts attention and inspires debate. A murdering, hunchbacked despot wearing a York rose(tte) could easily win against a LibDem has-been and and recycled Tory. Sure, he's dead. But the chronic non-attendance of their MP doesn't appear to have been a problem for the voters of Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath.